It may be the two cups of coffee coursing through my veins. Or the wonderful time of encouragement I had with my discipleship group. Or the amazing soundtrack from the movie Nerve. Or the changing of the seasons to one that is near and dear to my heart. Or the five months that my boyfriend and I have spent together today. Or the fact that this semester is going so much better than the last. Whatever it is, I feel alive for the first time in a while.

The past few months have been full of ups and downs for me. Part of the summer I rushed in and out of doctors appointments, urgent care and the emergency room as I dealt with severe chest pains, trouble breathing and lightheadedness. Clinically, nothing was wrong for which I am extremely thankful. However, without answers it was unclear what happened and why. One moment I could feel fine, the next I could be plagued by chest pain which sent my mind into a whirl of negative thoughts, doubts and generalizations that weren't true and ultimately caused me to doubt God and doubt the people who care for me. 

For those that know me, I love to work myself into a hole. I've already shared about my struggles in resting and taking time for myself and how well that worked out last semester. This semester it's been less intense so I've been able to 'rest' more, yet in my resting I often fail to actually rest and instead peruse Facebook or end up studying physics for eight hours straight. This semester, it seemed like every week I would struggle a day or two and often with chest pain accompanying that struggle. After much searching, I believe those pains are caused by stress and a high-functioning 'busy' anxiety.  People with high-functioning anxiety tend to keep themselves busy to avoid being alone with their own thoughts. They hide their anxiety with a smile or laughter and tend to 'turtle' or withdraw into themselves when things are going wrong instead of opening up and allowing others to help.

Recently, I've struggled with a lot of self-inflicted loneliness from shutting myself off from people. Only those closest to me who I let in have been able to see through the façade. It's taken many tears,  lonely moments and wise words from my best friends to help me realize how much I'd been hurting myself through this act of turtling. I'm an extrovert and I'd go to events and just feel depleted yet still I would smile and act like everything was ok. After those events I'd feel unsatisfied because of the lack of meaningful conversation. I desired for others to go out of their way to open up when I wasn't even willing to do so myself unless probed enough. I believed the lies Satan threw at me that no one wanted to know how I was really feeling when they asked me. I kept myself busy and avoided being home so that my family wouldn't see the cracks that we beginning to show. I nearly crushed a friendship by internalizing everything I was feeling and not allowing one of my best friends to help as she wanted to. 

I wanted to honestly share my struggles as a way of opening up and to be able to use the art of writing to not only help me understand what I've been learning since June but also to hopefully serve as an encouragement to others. The one thing I've learned and will continue learning is how blessed I am. God has placed some amazing people in my life who are there to encourage, support and challenge me. It breaks my heart that there have been many times when I've doubted those people and doubted God's love for me. I'm not on any medications, I haven't been to a doctor to have them corroborate my research, however I am now aware of a weakness I have. This weakness can not always be controlled however, I can do my best to seek the support of those around me, take my mind captive when negative thoughts creep in and rest with peace in the promises of God. This song by Jeremy Fisher has been a huge source of comfort and biblical truth for when I've had days of struggle: 

Those who trust in You have nothing to fear. 
For You are our Rock, You are our God.
And though the night is long we will not lose heart. 
For Your promise is sure, Our hope is secure. 

And though our hearts are breaking Lord we pray and cling to hope. 
That you are in control and all this pain will bring us good. 
For you are always faithful, always faithful, always true. 
And we will always trust You, always trust and wait for you.

Those who trust in You Are held in your love, 
You fill up our souls, In you we are whole. 
And when weakness comes and doubt sweeps in like a storm. 
Your grace will sustain, For you never change. 

And though our hearts are clinging to the things that bring us death.
 You will never leave us so in Your great love we rest. 
For you are always faithful, always faithful, always true. 
And we will always trust You, always trust and wait for you. 

--GeneticGinger

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My days are marked by a cyclic cycle consisting of praise Jesus hallelujah coffee, morning alarms that never seem to shut up, eight hours of being a wolf geneticist, tennis/biblestudy/movies/dinner with friends, continuous calendar checking and worry to make sure I'm not missing an appointment or meeting with someone and the minimal amount of sleep to stay functioning.

To be completely honest, I love having a bunch going on. It makes me feel important, special, popular and gives my life more meaning. It's a selfish passion that hurts me more than helps me... as I am painfully realizing.

Resting is not my forté. On a regular basis I hear the comment of 'Oh Emma you look really tired.' I pride myself on acting like everything is ok, that I'm fine and can keep putting my body through the craziness that I commit myself to every week. I struggle with taking time for myself and taking care of myself because I feel like my job is to take care of others and be there for them 100% of the time. Whenever I take a moment for myself to read, exercise, or just think, I am paralyzed. I think how I could be spending that time with others and how my time could be more productive and efficient. I fear that as soon as I take a moment for myself, those around me will think that I am less committed to them and do not care about them.

Back in March, I dealt with extensive anxiety because of all the things I was trying to do without taking care of myself. I foolishly thought that God would continue to sustain my body on 5 hours of sleep, minimal exercise and an inconsistent eating schedule. God, in his graciousness, allowed me to be plagued with pneumonia during the time when I thought my world was going to come crashing down because of all the things I was trying to support in my life, just by myself. After that, I realized that taking care of myself is crucial and that I'm going to be a less efficient witness if I am consistently run down and trying to catch up - even if I'm run down doing good things.

I say that I realized taking care of myself was important, but to be honest, I'm right back where I was in March. Thankfully less affected by anxiety, but I'm tired, run down, in need of sleep, and just a less effective version of myself. Ultimately, I'm realizing that the root of this recurring occurrence is an idol of control. I struggle with control and I've struggled with it for as long as I can remember. My efforts are spent trying to control everything from my schedule, my relationships and my future. I wonder why I run myself to the ground and the answer is literally staring me in the mirror. I struggle trusting that God has a plan for me that is better than what I could ever dream. I doubt the truths that God has so clearly laid out in Scripture. Ultimately, I lack trust in my Savior who chose me, redeemed me and is sanctifying me. This morning I woke up distraught over what God has been showing me in my heart. Even when God shows me parts of my heart that need pruned, I want to fix those problems quickly and on my time and control even what only God can control, my sanctification.

Right now life is difficult, but God reminded me this morning that I have been called to "rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer" (Romans 12:12). Even though I am walking through a spiritual valley, I am still called to be joyful and thankful for what God has placed in my life. Instead of focusing on my problems, overthinking and trying to control, God has called me to live a life marked by faith, a life marked by joy in every circumstance and ultimately a life marked by love for those around me. The lessons I'm learning are not without pain, but I'm thankful for a God who pushes me, challenges me and leads me further towards Himself. I am striving to focus on today. To rest, to let go and to choose joy because Christ chose me.

--GeneticGinger

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Every year I make it a priority to dwell upon the year before and create some resolutions for myself. This year, I wanted to center my life around my life verse:

  "She is clothed with strength and dignity and laughs without fear of the future." 
(Proverbs 31:25)

After coming out of the amazement and wonder that accompanies studying abroad, I knew that I needed to have a central mindset to adopt for this year so that I could keep my mind focused on the many tasks at hand.

Through Copenhagen, the Lord really wanted me to learn how to live in the moment, especially because I wanted to be back home experiencing things that everyone else was experiencing. Now I am having to live in the moment but in the reverse. Living in the moment is even more important for me at this stage of life. I can't live in the past and dwell constantly upon Copenhagen and the dream I lived out while there, but I also can't live in the future and worry about what I'm going to do after University. It's a very difficult balance that I have definitely not found yet. Day to day, I have to tell myself to focus on what is in front of me, whether that be a girlfriend for coffee, my sister who is trying to tell me an exciting story or my Physics professor. In the past, I would be physically present somewhere, but fail to be mentally present since I was planning my life in my head, trying to solve a homework problem or just zoning out. God has really challenged me to live in the moment because it allows me to focus on what God has placed in front of me, instead of trying to live according to what Emma wants all of the time.

Many people (especially through the last week) have asked me "How are you doing?" with a hint of curiosity in their voice because they expect me to be having a really hard time adjusting. Others are just wondering when the crap will hit the ceiling in my life and to be honest so am I. Over these past three weeks, I have been so happy and content... it's been scary! I've had a hard time understanding it. As I have dwelt upon the reasons for this happiness, I've realized that the sole reason is God. There was a day in Copenhagen where I began having a panic attack when I thought about coming back home and having to get integrated back into my church, train my brain into studying again (study abroad? We all know it's just abroad...), and furthering friendships. I was so worried. God has totally had his hand around me for sure through these past three weeks. As I am adjusting back and encountering the American way of life, I have been forced to be in constant communication with God and that has made the world of difference. When I walked into my college church group expecting it to feel like home, but it felt totally different, I gave it to God. When I failed my first quiz in Biochemistry, I gave it to the Lord. When I woke up with the absolute worst attitude because it was cold and early and my tea was bad, I gave it to the Lord. I've just realized how much I need God every single moment of my day and how much better my days are when he is part of them!

I have also realized that I am a different person. My friends have told me that I've changed a lot but I didn't really believe them until I'd had the chance to be back home. There have been many days when I have realized that I have to make a decision. Am I going to fall back into my old routines, or am I going to create new ones that represent my changed self? There have been many times when I want to choose the easy path, but making new routines like making myself talk to new people at church, or making myself run in freezing temperatures, or just not drinking Cheerwine for my health has made such a difference in adjusting back home.

I know that right now, I'm enjoying being back because life is different and new and yet all the same but I don't doubt that there will be a time where that will wear off. However, now I am choosing to live in the moment and rely on God because he is the source of my happiness.

--GeneticGinger

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Dear Copenhagen,

I am going to miss you so much. In five very short months we have become closer than I could have ever imagined - which makes it very hard to leave. It's going to be wonderful to see all of my friends again, but I know there will still be a hole in my heart where you belong. Before I get on the plane back to America I wanted to thank you for all that you've done and all that you've meant to me.

Thank you for introducing me to so many amazing people. After dealing with tidal waves of loneliness and culture shock, I was in need of some good friends to keep my mind off of home. You provided that and more. From my host family to my actual Danish family, to my friends, I was enormously blessed with the amount of support and love that they showed me. They showed me around castles, islands, coffee shops, countries, libraries, museums and everywhere in between. They were my eyes to see new sights and my sounding board to understand and appreciate opinions different than mine.

Thank you for the amazing food that will be sorely missed. The fresh, crunchy bread that I woke up to in the mornings with a piece of cheese and chocolate on it. The rich, sweet chocolate that I bought in literally every city I could (Danish chocolate was still the best). The dark, aromatic coffee that made my eyes burn and my mind churn at a frantic pace as I sipped its goodness. THE PASTRIES. Oh my the pastries. Buttery, succulence that melts in your mouth. I know that once I go back to America I will try to recreate some of the amazing things I tasted, but they will never taste of Copenhagen. People in America will laugh when I eat a rye bread smørrebrød with a fork or when I salivate over the thought of amazing beet/carrot/cabbage salad or when I go on and on about an amazing chocolate milk called Cocio.

Thank you for opening my eyes to both the bad and the good. I have seen a lot of the world during these five months: Denmark, Scotland, England, Germany, Sweden, Kosovo, Albania, Austria, Hungary, and the Czech-Republic. I have been able to understand so much more of the European politics to actually be worried about the future of our world. I have also seen things that I never have the desire to see again. On the flip side, I have been so fortunate to see people go out of their way to help me. From the homeless man who carried my bike up the stairs, to the lady who opened up her apartment to me so I could go to the bathroom. My faith in humanity has been restored. I have seen how change is a good thing. Denmark does not have to be the same as America. They both are amazing countries with some great differences between them but one is not better than the other.

Thank you for the loneliness that I experienced. Besides being one of the more challenging and dark times of my life, it taught me so much about myself. Through my loneliness, I was forced to examine myself in the mirror with no one around me to hide me from myself. The loneliness made me realize how I can rely on Christ to strengthen me and that I don't need others to do that. Tears were shed but those tears allowed me to grow, and strengthened myself as a person. After hiding behind the shadow of others for 18 years,  I have finally been able to stand on my own as a person and be so strong and so confident in myself and my abilities.

Thank you for the adventures we had together. From midnight bike rides through the city to coffee shop hopping to American festivals with real Ford F-150s to Star Wars nights with Danes, to deep conversations at 3am to hearing crazy people on the S-train, belly-laughing at the antics of my host families children to not understanding a word of what someone said to me to crazy Hungarian ticket ladies who don't speak a lick of English to eating breakfast, lunch and dinner at the concierge in Budapest to that one time I accidentally took out $700 in Budapest to feeling violated by all the people at a twenty-one pilots concert to crying over stupid love stories to watching friends with Danish subtitles to eating so much food at Dalle Valle to just living and loving life here.

Thank you for the laughter that we shared. No one may have understood my silent chucking during culture class at a meme, or my guffaw at the guy with a little tiny man bun, or my sarcastic jokes that Danes don't understand, or my belly-laugh when I ran into someone's mailbox and dented my bike basket, or my constant laughter at the Danish language and the funny nuances of it, but I still laughed. Whenever I was lonely or homesick all I had to do was laugh and life was significantly better.

Thank you for new perspectives. Copenhagen is quite different from Cary, NC in the politics, people, lifestyles and so much more. From my many encounters with those who think/believe differently from me, I have been able to understand and appreciate the perspectives of others, even if I don't agree with them. I know I'm going to go home and utilize some of those perspectives in my own life, but I am thankful that I have been exposed to so many different views on life, the universe, and everything.

Thank you for affording me a glimpse of a different future. From going to Kosovo to being here in Copenhagen to being in Albania to thinking about back home there is so much that I could do. You have showed me that the world lays at my feet. I could be a Science teacher, get my Master's, get my Ph.D, go volunteer for a year, go intern. I can do anything and everything and I don't know what I want to do, but that is ok. I don't have to know the future, I just have to live in the now.

Thank you for the beauty. I never believed that one country, filled with only 5.6 million people, could be so gorgeous on so many different levels. Everything I saw, blew me away. The grounds in Fredericksborg Castle, the many colored bikes riding beside me, the modern tapestries in the Queen's Royal Reception rooms, the sun setting at 3 pm, the families laughing and smiling together, the tall, attractive Danish men, the design of Danish homes, and the nature all around.

Kære København, jeg siger ikke farvel. Jeg siger kun vi ses til næste gang. Jeg elsker dig og jeg skal kommer tilbage snart. Jeg skal kommer tilbage snart. Mange tak for alt.

--GeneticGinger

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I have less than a month here in Denmark. I really don't want to leave nor do I feel ready to leave. Nevertheless, I am coming back to good ole' North Cackalacky. Over the past few weeks, I've begun to ponder and dwell intentionally on this experience and how it's changed and shaped me.  I've been thinking especially about how I'm going to be a different person back home and what it will be like to integrate back into the American culture.

This semester I've been writing a paper for my 'American Fiction between the World Wars' class on the Lost Generation of World War I. This generation was comprised of those young people who grew up in both mind and body during WWI. This generation was marked not only by the changing times, but also by their lost nature, both spiritually and physically. The young men who fought in Europe came back to America changed. They expected America to be the same as when they left but America changed as well during the war. They struggled to find their place because of the change within the culture but mainly because they had gone through things that no one else had gone through. For those who came back from the war, they entered into a stage of exploration where young men and women experimented with what they found behind the curtain of adulthood in order to develop new morals and beliefs since the war shattered the old ones.

 The homecoming Ernest Hemingway and F. Scott Fitzgerald expected was not at all what they received and they felt like outcasts immediately upon stepping on American soil. These two expatriates did not fit in with the American culture. This inspired them to write three literary masterpieces: Farewell to Arms, The Sun also Rises and Tender is the Night. In these three novels, the idea of the expatriate is further delved into. The expatriate is one who has 'lost touch with the soil' and desires to go back to Europe. The expatriate is one who is changed by their time abroad. Ultimately, the expatriate is one who is literally an ex-patriot - they are an exile out of their own country.

Studying the works of Hemingway and Fitzgerald has been a great prequel to my own homecoming. In many ways, I have related to the characters of Lt. Frederic Henry in Farewell to Arms, Robert Cohn in The Sun Also Rises and Dick Diver in Tender is the Night. All of these men were expatriates and all of them struggled to find their place in both the European and American culture. In many ways I'm definitely not a Dane and I don't completely fit into the Danish culture over here, but in other ways I have changed so much as a person from five months ago. Life back home has changed as well and in many ways I will be coming back as an 'exile.' I don't think I will identify as much with American culture from my time in Europe and that's a scary thought.

I've tried to begin preparing myself on the reality of coming back to the USA. One of my good friends told me that when I return most people will only want to hear maybe at most, a two-minute synopsis of my time in Copenhagen. Another friend mentioned that people will probably get tired of hearing about my experiences and won't really care at all. I've definitely had friends who have made an effort to understand my life in Copenhagen through frequent messages, texts, letters and snapchats. They've let me pour out my heart as I try to understand life over here myself, they've supported me through the tough days, and they've continued to be there for me no matter what. However, very few people will be able to relate to my experiences here in beautiful Copenhagen. They won't understand hygge, the obsession with Christmas, the biking culture, being an American in a totally foreign place and also how much someone learns and can change in just five months. Some will try but most won't even care. I'm not trying to be cynical, I'm just trying to have realistic expectations. 

For as long as I can remember, I have always held myself to extremely high, basically unreachable expectations just because I like a challenge. Half the time the challenge ends up seriously damaging my mental health because there is no earthly way I can complete it. When I first came here to Copenhagen, I had very high expectations about everything and I had to work through a lot of disappointment based on how high I had made my expectations. Through my time here, I've definitely had to lower my expectations and because of that I've been much more satisfied. Nevertheless, I worry that my expectations of returning to America are too high. Life won't be all roses.

I worry about coming back. I feel so comfortable here in Denmark now. I've put down roots and now I'm a tree being yanked out of the soil I've been in for five months. I worry what it will be like to integrate back into the culture of N.C. State. I worry if I can integrate into my groups of friends at my church in the way I used to be. Most of all, I worry that my time over here in Denmark has changed my view on life so much that it will be difficult to be mentally present in North Carolina.

I'm trying to prepare myself for the reality of coming back from studying abroad. Reverse culture shock is a legitimate thing that happens when you return home from studying abroad and part of me thinks I won't have any problem with it, but the other more realistic side of me realizes that the time it took for me to get accustomed to Denmark will probably be similar to the time it takes for me to feel reintegrated. Don't get me wrong, I am excited to come home and see all my friends and catch up, walk around State's campus again and enjoy all the amazing American foods I have missed, but at the same time, I'm a realist and I know myself and know that it is going to be hard coming back home. I am an expatriate and I have lost touch with the American soil, now I just have to be replanted in it again.

--GeneticGinger

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Cambridge National Cemetery

This past weekend I traveled to London for a fun-filled weekend with friends seeing Twenty-One Pilots, touring Victoria & Albert Museum and going on Sherlock walking tours. I did not expect that I would walk in on something that would bring me to tears and give me even more of an appreciation for those who serve in the military.

Sunday morning I decided to take a walk and head to the British Museum. As I passed Westminster Abbey I beheld a massive crowd of people gathering around the streets in droves - I had no idea what was going on. As I joined the crowd, craning my neck to try to get a glimpse of something (yeah I know I'm short) I heard patriotic music over loudspeakers and then realized that November 8th in the United Kingdom is Veteran's/Remembrance Day. I waited around for a while to see what was going to happen because I assumed that I had caught the tail end of the ceremony, but I was wrong. As we sang 'God Save the Queen' the Queen's car, escorted by many police officers, drove down towards Buckingham Palace and ended what I thought was the extent of what the Brits do for remembrance day. Suddenly, marching music began and around the corner came these old men all dressed in their military uniforms marching to be honored but also show appreciation for their country. For those of you who know me, I am a very emotionless person and I do not get emotional very easily. As I saw the pride in their looks and heard the thunderous clapping I couldn't help but get choked up and think back to my Great-Grandfather Bamp who served in World War II and how amazing it would have been had he been here today to walk in this parade. This trip was my first time being back in the United Kingdom since I became a British citizen in August (thanks Mum!) and I could not have come at a better time. To be in my country while Remembrance Day was happening was so surreal and wonderful as it showed me that even though America and the United Kingdom are different, they still carry such pride and honor for their veterans and treat them with the respect they deserve.

Remembrance Crosses at Westminster Abbey

For the past ten years, I've been traveling with my grandparents on WWII bomber group reunions with my Great-Great Uncle's bomber group. It's been one of my highlights every year as I am not only able to honor the memory of my Great-Great Uncle who died in a B-24 crash, but I appreciate the sacrifice of these amazing men and women who give their lives and service to their country since I've gotten to know some amazing veterans through the reunions. Being in London and experiencing the military pride and seeing how the amazing men and women of Britain served their country struck a cord with me as I guess I just assumed that America was the only country who celebrated their veterans with as much honor as we do.

Pilot Robert W. Marx

On this day of remembrance in America where we honor our veterans and their service - remember. Don't forget the sacrifices they have made for your freedom. Don't forget the old man who is your neighbor and has no one to celebrate them. Don't forget your relative who died in war a long time ago. Most importantly, don't forget those who are present in your life right now. My thanks and remembrance today go out to my Great-Great uncle who flew B-24s during WWII. He has impacted my life in so many ways even though I never had the opportunity to know him. To my Great-Grandfather Bamp who served in the British Royal Air Force and even though he never talked about the war, he still played a vital part in guarding bases during WWII. To my Grandpa who served for 30 years in the U.S. Army and has instilled in me to remember and not forget. To my Aunt Aimee who served as a nurse in the U.S. Air Force and continued the family legend of those who serve for our country. To my Uncle Jason who served in the British Army during the 1st Gulf War and in Bosnia with a love for his country. My family has served their different countries in many ways and I am so thankful for them and their service.

--GeneticGinger

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Dyrehaven Forest

As I sit here drinking a succulent Danish mocha surrounded by candles and what is actually termed 'post-modernism jukebox' music my artistic self bids me to write and screams "Write you fool!" through my core so that's us.

Denmark is a very liberal nation to put it lightly. Anything and everything goes here. It's very different from what I'm used to, but I don't think America is far from being this liberal. The Danes, I would say in my limited perspective, pride themselves on welcoming any and every kind of people. While sometimes this has surprised me, I have to say that I have learned so much from the way their culture is built on respect. The Danes are content to let people have their own opinions and not have to prove that their personal opinion is better. This a far cry from America where you begin talking about religion or politics and you have to run and find shelter before the conversation blows up.

Having grown up in a southern Baptist church in a Christian homeschool circle,  I've unknowingly adopted certain views about groups of people - views filled with prejudice and judgment, some of that prejudice and judgement warranted, but most of it not. I would not attribute all of this view to me and how I grew up but rather with American society as a whole. Tolerance and equality are preached in America, now more than ever, but never actually realized. In my experience, someone has said they respect my view and don't agree with it which is totally ok, but then follow that statement up with why and how my belief is wrong all the while insulting me and my intelligence. Americans have this innate need to prove things. We are not very good at agreeing to disagree and this leads to conversations like the one above where someone's intelligence is insulted. This needs to change!

One of my favorite things about studying abroad, especially in Denmark, has been to be exposed to different worldviews, many of which I don't agree with, but I can still respect. One of my good friends here in Copenhagen is bisexual and in almost everything, she has opposite views from me. But you know what? We actually laugh about how different we are and then we begin discussing our understanding of life, the universe and everything but without getting angry, being disrespectful or rude. As two intelligent adults, we are just interested in knowing more about each others worldviews and sharing about our life. Everyone has a desire to be understood and to share about themselves so that others can understand them and we are connecting on a human level by talking about what life means to us.

Antagonistic conversations rarely help any situtation or friendship, rather they serve to drive friends and family members apart. As Christians we are called to love everyone - even our enemies! Some may think I've become more tolerant/accepting over this semester abroad because I've been "indoctrinated by worldly ideals" since anything goes in Denmark. What's really happened is that my snap judgments and privileged prejudices and opinions have been erased and I've begun to see people who I wouldn't normally associate with/agree with clearly as Jesus sees them. They are people who live life like me, go through similar things and have the same hopes and dreams that I do. I'll admit that I used to judge people quite a lot - I never shared my judgement with others, but nevertheless I still judged when it wasn't right to judge and that's wrong.

I've definitely seen some things in Denmark/abroad that disturbed me to my very core but from being exposed to that I've been forced to examine my responses and actions to such things. At the same time, my views and perspective of people has changed from judging them right away to seeking to understand them and get to know them and for that I'm grateful for my time here in Denmark.

Jesus calls you to love. Passing automatic judgment is the opposite of that. What did Christ do? He went and spent time with those who the society rejected - lepers, tax collectors, sinners. What did He do? He got into their world, sought to understand them and then loved them and challenged them right where they were.

We as Christians are called to this same path and it's taken me traveling all the way to Copenhagen to live here for five months for me to even begin to see clearly and scratch the surface of this crucial concept. I'm not even close to understanding yet, but God has changed my heart and opened my eyes and I hope He challenges you to open your eyes as well.

-GeneticGinger

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